This season, this team, just unbelievable. I mean, it's bad enough that we handed away a World Series berth in 2006, that we choked worse than George W Bush on that pretzel in both 2007 and 2008, but this year, we Mets fans thought our problems were solved. We finally had a bullpen. Johan was in his second year in NY. Our offense was coming off a good year, with Delgado ready for a full season like his second half last year. But then, we remembered....WE'RE THE ****ING METS.
AS THE ****ING SOUP NAZI FROM SEINFELD WOULD TELL US "NO SUCCESS FOR YOU!"
It's one thing to struggle, it's one thing to have a down ****ing year, but to have the type of luck, the type of nauseating losses, the devastating injuries, it's just pure insanity. If Delgado were to regress to his struggles from early last season, if Luis Castillo was to continue sucking, or if Sheffield was a useless player, I would understand completely. But for the entire team to either struggle or get hurt (or both), is just UN-****ING-BELIEVABLE!
I mean, I've been hearing for months now, and I know that I can't blame this team, because no team could ****ing win if they had 10 players(including their SS and leadoff hitter, their CF and 3rd hitter, their 1B and cleanup hitter, their #3 starter, their set up man all out for long periods of time, as well as their #4, 5, and multiple backup SP's, their backup CF, 2 of their backup SS's). I get that. But still, the fact that every ****ing day this team finds a new ****ing way to disappoint is just unreal.
First we had the injuries. Those were ****ing bad. Delgado and Reyes went down. And Reyes was worse because he came back too quick and made it worse (which appears to be the Mets' TEAM ****ING MOTTO: "NY Mets: Making Injuries worse since 1962".
Then, we had the fraud of a ****ing game in LA where Church missed 3rd, we made 5 errors(and at least one more that wasn't given as an error), and a little piece of me ****ing DIED watching that game.
Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, they had to ****ING TOP EVEN THAT! The ****ing Luis Castillo play, which I have now witnessed on replay only like 35972359873 ****ing times, may be the most embarrassing moment in my sports ****ing life. As sports fans, we exaggerate a lot. But to be completely honest, any ****ING SHMUCK that you pull off the streets, any person from this website, any person from this website's MOTHER could ****ing make that play. And the most telling thing about that was that if it had been reversed, the Mets wouldn't have hustled enough to score.
Now, we see the Mets with 10 players on the DL, with Luis Castillo day to day with a sprained ankle (FROM WALKING DOWN THE ****ING DUGOUT STAIRS!), and the Cardinals are throwing at David Wright's face, with no retaliation from the Mets. ****ING GREAT.
OUR ****ING LINEUP CONSISTS OF ANGEL PAGAN, ANGEL ****ING BERROA, ALEX CORA, AND OMIR ****ING SANTOS EVERY DAY. OUR CLEANUP HITTER FRANCOUER HAS 1 UNIINTENTIONAL WALK IN HIS LAST 20 GAMES. OUR #3 HITTER HAS 8 ****ING HR ALL YEAR. OUR TEAM LEADER IN HR HAS LESS THAN 1/3 AS MANY AS PUJOLS. OUR ****ING ROSTER HAS 45 ****ING HOMERUNS. PUJOLS HAS 36. MARK REYNOLDS HAS PLAYED 3 GAMES AT CITI FIELD AND HAS AS MANY HR THERE AS DAVID WRIGHT!
OUR BULLPEN IS A JOKE. WE THOUGHT WE SHORED IT UP, BUT PUTZ WAS HURT, SEAN GREAN IS SOOOO BAD. MANUEL FORGETS THAT STOKES EVEN EXISTS, AND INSTEAD USES PEDRO FELICIANO EVERY GOD DAMN DAY. I SWEAR, MANUEL PROBABLY TRIED TO USE FELICIANO TWICE IN A GAME WHEN THE BULLPEN COACH HAD TO TELL HIM THAT WASN'T ALLOWED. GREEN, IN ONE WEEK, HAS GIVEN UP GAME WINNING RUNS ON A HBP AND A WP. UN-****ING-BELIEVABLE.
The team can't even lose easy, they have to torture you every ****ing night. To ****ing watch this team is almost impossible. The amazing thing is that every time they have a 4 game losing streak, they play a game or two that actually makes you believe they might not suck.
BUT NO, THIS TEAM SUCKS. THEY'RE ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY GOD AWFUL. I WOULD SAY THAT THEY SHOULD SEND WRIGHT AND SANTANA HOME, BUT THEY'D GET HURT SCRUBBING THE ****ING TOILETS.
I'd like to thank you all for coming today...to say a few words about the death of this season. IT'S OVER. THE METS ARE DONE. OVER. JUST QUIT. GIVE UP. THEY'LL WIN NO MORE THAN 77 GAMES THIS YEAR, AND THAT'S IF THEY'RE LUCKY.
I never thought I'd say this. I held out hope through 2007 and 2008...but I give up on this season.