Contract of Wifely Expectations

[DirtyKash]

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...contract1.html

Sicko "Marriage Contract" One For The Ages
Repulsive "Wifely Expectations" pact emerges in Iowa kidnap case

FEBRUARY 17--This country, as you know, is filled with the deranged. And then there's Travis Frey, a 33-year-old Iowa man who is facing charges that he tried to kidnap his own wife (not to mention a separate child pornography rap). Frey, prosecutors contend, apparently is a rather demanding guy. In fact, he actually drew up a bizarre four-page marriage document--a "Contract of Wifely Expectations"--that sought to establish guidelines for his spouse in terms of hygiene, clothing, and sexual activities. In return for fulfilling certain requirements, Frey (pictured right) offered "Good Behavior Days," or GBDs. Each GBD, Frey wrote, could be redeemed by his wife to "get out of doing the things" he requested daily. A copy of the proposed contract, which Frey's wife never signed and later provided to cops, can be found below. While we normally point out the highlights of most documents, there are so many in this demented, and very graphic, contract, we really can't do it justice. So set aside ten minutes--and prepare to be repulsed. (4 pages)

[Lynch]

That shit can NOT be real. And if it is, you can't fault a guy for asking for what he wants. Before someone virtutally slaps the hell out of me, hear me out:

He lists what he wants and he's VERY detailed in it. There's no room for interpretation. There's no question of the expectations. Dude wants a clean, naked, well groomed woman in his house. I don't see anything wrong with that, do you?! If the woman only had a mute button, she'd be just about perfect,wouldn't she?!

[DirtyKash]

If his wife had signed the agreement, this guy would be the biggest pimp in the history of marriage.

[Slyder]

If this indeed then get signed he is right now living in a Mans paradise. I cant see many women actually agreeing to this though.

[Fishercat]

So...how long until the woman files a rape suit? Really, this can't hold up in court? Even if it's real.

Haha, that's insane though.

[RockSports17]

Wow.....i'm amazed. If I was her, I would've made a contract to see if he would've signed it....but definitely seems like the guy may not be all there.

[ATLien]

That's pretty sick.

And by sick, I don't mean wicked awesome. I mean, dude is not right.

[A'sDiehard]

Men's Rules


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports is like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months IS a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't! dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, Or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
cou! ch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like
camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can, to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can, to give them a bigger laugh.

[Lynch]

Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

I actually printed that off and posted it above the employee toilet at a bar I used to bounce at. I remember one day going in there and seeing a sign that said "PUT THE DAMN SEAT BACK DOWN" and figuring that if I can lift it, they can lower it, thus the sign I put up.

The sign didn't stay up too long, but it was good for laughs for a lot of us guys.

[Molina00]

Men's Rules


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports is like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months IS a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't! dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, Or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
cou! ch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like
camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can, to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can, to give them a bigger laugh.

I like those. Good stuff there.

[Dry1313]

Dude that guy has serious issues. His lady should do that without even needing to sign anything

[HollywoodLeo]

I read about this not too long ago.

She didn't sign it...as she shouldn't have.

[ghettochild]

that guy is a hard ass sadist.