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Thread: Classic lines from movies or tv shows

  1. #1
    Administrator HollywoodLeo's Avatar
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    Classic lines from movies or tv shows

    I loved this thread in the old forum. Don't know if this should go in the "random games" forum or not, so feel free to move it there if you like.

    NEWMAN: A second later, something happened that changed us in a deep and
    profound way front that day forward.

    ELAINE: What was it?

    KRAMER: He spit on us.... and I screamed out, "I'm hit!"

    NEWMAN: Then I turned and the spit ricochet off him and it hit me.

    ELAINE: Wow! What a story.

    JERRY: Unfortunately the immutable laws of physics contradict the whole premise
    of your account. Allow me to reconstruct this if I may for Miss Benes as
    I've heard this story a number of times.

    JERRY: Newman, Kramer, if you'll indulge me. According to your story Keith
    passes you and starts walking up the ramp then you say you were struck on the right temple. The spit then proceeds to ricochet off the temple
    striking Newman between the third and forth rib. The spit then came off
    the rib turned and hit Newman in the right wrist causing him to drop his
    baseball cap. The spit then splashed off the wrist, Pauses In mid air
    mind you- makes a left turn and lands on Newman's left thigh. That is one
    magic luggie.
    LeagueTeamyearsRecordWild CardDivisionPennantsTitles
    MSLSan Diego Padres2034-20592,217-1,9951631
    TBLArizona Diamondbacks2005-20181,216-1,0531963
    TSSLSan Diego Padres2015-2021, 2024-20281,017-9280732
    TSSLTexas Rangers2029-2033396-4140000

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by HollywoodLeo
    I loved this thread in the old forum. Don't know if this should go in the "random games" forum or not, so feel free to move it there if you like.

    NEWMAN: A second later, something happened that changed us in a deep and
    profound way front that day forward.

    ELAINE: What was it?

    KRAMER: He spit on us.... and I screamed out, "I'm hit!"

    NEWMAN: Then I turned and the spit ricochet off him and it hit me.

    ELAINE: Wow! What a story.

    JERRY: Unfortunately the immutable laws of physics contradict the whole premise
    of your account. Allow me to reconstruct this if I may for Miss Benes as
    I've heard this story a number of times.

    JERRY: Newman, Kramer, if you'll indulge me. According to your story Keith
    passes you and starts walking up the ramp then you say you were struck on the right temple. The spit then proceeds to ricochet off the temple
    striking Newman between the third and forth rib. The spit then came off
    the rib turned and hit Newman in the right wrist causing him to drop his
    baseball cap. The spit then splashed off the wrist, Pauses In mid air
    mind you- makes a left turn and lands on Newman's left thigh. That is one
    magic luggie.
    I suspect there was a second spitter.

  3. #3
    I'd quote the entire script to Swingers, but I don't think it would fit.

  4. #4
    Administrator HollywoodLeo's Avatar
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    more Seinfeld.

    Steinbrenner: George let me tell you something. When I find something I like I stick with it. From 1973 to 1982 I ate the exact same lunch everyday, turkey chili in a bowl made out of bread. Bread bowl George! You'd eat the chili then you'd eat the bowl. Nothing more satisfying than looking down after lunch and seeing just a table.
    LeagueTeamyearsRecordWild CardDivisionPennantsTitles
    MSLSan Diego Padres2034-20592,217-1,9951631
    TBLArizona Diamondbacks2005-20181,216-1,0531963
    TSSLSan Diego Padres2015-2021, 2024-20281,017-9280732
    TSSLTexas Rangers2029-2033396-4140000

  5. #5
    Future PGA Tour Golfer DirtyKash's Avatar
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    Woman: You don't know my name, do you?
    Jerry: Yes I do.
    Woman: What is it?
    Jerry: It, uh, rhymes with a female body part.
    Woman: WHAT IS IT?
    Jerry: ...........Mulva..........?

    (she walks out the door)

    Jerry: Gipple?
    Jerry: Loleola?

  6. #6
    Guess Who's Back missionhockey21's Avatar
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    Another Seinfeld quote:

    JERRY: I had a very interesting lunch with George Costanza today.
    KRAMER: Really?
    JERRY: We were talking about our lives and we both kind of realized we're kids. We're not men.
    KRAMER: So, then you asked yourselves, "Isn't there something more to life?"
    JERRY: Yes. We did.
    KRAMER: Yeah, well, let me clue you in on something. There isn't.
    JERRY: There isn't?

    KRAMER: Absolutely not. I mean, what are you thinking about, jerry? Marriage? Family?
    JERRY: Well...
    KRAMER: They're prisons. Man made prisons. You're doing time. You get up in the morning. She's there. You go to sleep at night. She's there. It's like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom. Is it all right if I use the bathroom now?
    JERRY: Really?
    KRAMER: Yeah, and you can forget about watching TV while you're eating.
    JERRY: I can?
    KRAMER: Oh, yeah. You know why? Because it's dinner time. And you know what you do at dinner?
    JERRY: What?
    KRAMER: You talk about your day. How was your day today? Did you have a good day today or a bad day today? Well, what kind of day was it? Well, I don't know. How about you? How was your day?

    JERRY: Boy.
    KRAMER: It's sad , Jerry. It's a sad state of affairs..
    JERRY: I'm glad we had this talk.
    KRAMER: Oh, you have no idea.

  7. #7
    Hall of Famer 777rak's Avatar
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    Star Wars:
    May the focre be with you

    Luke I am your father

  8. #8
    Administrator HollywoodLeo's Avatar
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    even better than that one.

    Dark Helmet: [mask down] Not so fast, Lone Starr.
    Lone Starr: Helmet. So, at last we meet for the first time for the last time. [thinks about what he said] Yeah.
    Dark Helmet: Before you die, there is something you should know about us, Lone Starr.
    Lone Starr: What?
    Dark Helmet: I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former room-mate.
    Lone Starr: What's that make us?
    Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing...which is what you are about to become.
    LeagueTeamyearsRecordWild CardDivisionPennantsTitles
    MSLSan Diego Padres2034-20592,217-1,9951631
    TBLArizona Diamondbacks2005-20181,216-1,0531963
    TSSLSan Diego Padres2015-2021, 2024-20281,017-9280732
    TSSLTexas Rangers2029-2033396-4140000

  9. #9
    The Clubhouse Co-Mod HuskerFan2002's Avatar
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    "Like I told my first wife, honey, I never drive faster than I can see and besides that its all in the reflexes." - Jack Burton

    "How do you know she's a witch?" "Because she looks like one?"

    Dumb and dumber is full of awesome lines...

    Lloyd: What is the soup du jour?
    Waitress: It's The Soup of the Day.
    Lloyd: Mmmm... that sounds good, I'll have that.

    and

    Harry: Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her enough or something I don't know I really wasn't paying attention.

    My personal favorite is when Loyd is coming out of the 7-11
    Lloyd: Hey guys, oh big gulps huh... alright well see you later.

    I don't know why but that little scene cracks me up every time, and it was never in the script it was pure adlibbing by Carey.

  10. #10
    Guess Who's Back missionhockey21's Avatar
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    JERRY: What were you doing?

    GEORGE: Well, it's not my fault. You poked me!

    JERRY: You're supposed to just take a peek after a poke. You were like you just put a quarter into one of those big metal things on top of the Empire State Building.

    GEORGE: It's cleavage. I couldn't look away. What am I, waiting to win an Oscar here? This is all I have in my life.

    JERRY: Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun, you don't stare at it. It's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

    GEORGE: All right. So, he caught me in a cleavage peek, so big deal. Who wouldn't look at his daughter's cleavage? She's got nice cleavage.

    JERRY: That's why I poked.

    GEORGE: That's why I peeked.

  11. #11
    Terence Mann: Ray, people will come Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. Of course, we won't mind if you look around, you'll say. It's only $20 per person. They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces. People will come Ray. The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.

  12. #12
    Hall of Famer ATLien's Avatar
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    Are You My Caucasian?

  13. #13
    The future is now volzok's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Impossibles
    I suspect there was a second spitter.
    In the bushes on the gravely road. Thats classic.

    Here is the greatest line in movie history from the movie They Live.

    Rowdy Roddy Piper: I came here to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubble gum. So stupid its classic.

  14. #14
    Guess Who's Back missionhockey21's Avatar
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    From AD season 2:

    Maeby: Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the ‘T’ on it?

    Michael: That’s a cross.

    Maeby: Across from where?

  15. #15
    Guess Who's Back missionhockey21's Avatar
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    Another AD quote....

    George, Sr.: We all must seek forgiveness.

    Michael: Well, I’ll call the warden for you. You can ask him yourself.

    George, Sr.: Well, I think that’s for... for fresh crimes. Besides, you’ve always tried to lead a clean life. You and G.O.B. were like those biblical brothers, Gallant and, um... Goofuth.
    Last edited by missionhockey21; 04-22-2005 at 03:15 AM.

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