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Thread: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 2

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    KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 2

    Learn who shot J.R. here! No, actually, for the first part, click


    (After the fact snippet: I never thought I'd see an all star game last this long, with no weather delay, but mostly because of the Selig Disaster. It may not be immediate, but expect some fall out by seasons end. Why? Players used more than they were supposed to, players used period, etc.. Someone will blame someone by October for their failures because of this very game. It's in the nature of a human to not accept responsibility like that. At any rate, Dan Uggla, godspeed man.)

    11:03
    Good hustle by Tejada and some wind prevent the Padres from choking in the all star game again (Adrian Gonzalez with a mild fly out). Albert Pujols is now out of the game, perhaps the worst news possible for NL fans.
    Speaking of which, the fans started chanting overrated. HollywoodLeo doesn't understand.
    Also did some searching and it turns out McCarver was mumbling something about Papelbon's wife being pregnant. Apparently she was threatened during the parade? Where's John McLane at to end this misery?

    11:06
    FOX is officially frightened to death to show any Dark Knight ads.
    DC Comics is going to hit a titanic homerun with that film. Sadly, it's their only hit outside of Batman Begins. If you're keeping score at home: Marvel 10, DC 2

    11:10
    Encouraging sign for the AL, looks like Wilson and Wagner will close out the game.

    11:11
    Did Aaron Boone's homerun happen at Yankee stadium? I can see fans making it the number one moment. Every real yankee would roll over in their grave.

    11:13
    AL dug out cheers as Billy Wagner enters.
    This game could end before Bon Bon's bed time.

    11:16
    FOX just cut in the middle of a reality show promo for the game. They should really consider doing that more often.
    Buck blames everyone for telling him Guillen was the last man on the bench, when it's actually Tony Parker's wife. We're on orange for the Buckometer.

    11:17
    Clint Hurdle's "strategery" did not include holding base runners. Tom Sizemore took second without a throw. Longoria tied it. Did you not believe me when the AL was cheering as Wagner entered?

    11:20
    So much for this game ending in the near future, right?

    11:26
    Mo comes in. Scripted nicely by Disney

    11:31
    How many prisons are they breaking out of in Prison Break?
    Have they contacted Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage yet? Clint Eastwood?

    11:32
    Strike 'em out throw 'em out for the AL. That will never get old.

    11:35
    Did you know FRINGE will be on FOX this fall? 9/9/08!!!

    11:37
    Dempster's throwing motion has me feeling queazy. No wonder he's been good this season.

    11:42
    Dempster just dominated the AL, striking out the side.

    11:47
    Buck keeps reminding us that both teams are running low on pitchers. Apparently Webb and Kazmir are unlikely to go. The AL is out of reserves. Good times.

    11:52
    Tejada entered Sandman.
    1st and 3rd for the NL

    11:53
    Dan Uggla did not enter Sandman.

    11:56
    Uggla is killing the NL right now. But no ill will from me towards him. I love the guy. By the way, I am still alive.

    11:57
    Dan Uggla, I don't think is still alive.

    12:00 am
    I'm on record as saying the NL will not survive this.

    12:03
    Cristian Guzman is playing third, has he played third before? Good play on his part. Two outs and I really need to pee.

    12:04
    Jinx is on. I don't care if Tejada is 40, he's clutch. And I peed myself.

    12:07
    I'm working on 7 pages now. Adrian Balboa Gonzalez is batting. Please do something productive.

    12:08
    He heard me!
    Soria and Sherrill remain for the AL, and Kazmir is around but won't pitch. The NL has Marmol and Lidge, Webb is in Kazmir's boat and Lincecum got hit by the flu (or did the Sacramento Kings poison his hotel food?).

    12:13
    I hate where this is going. I have moved to the point where I'm just cheering for someone to score. What do you do if it ties, decide home field by record? What happens if the world series teams have the same record? Too many questions and no answers. Bud Selig is popping every pill he can find. I'm going to hit 9 pages of diary, it'll break the S3F bandwidth.

    12:15
    Commercials cut to somber glimpses of Bobby Murcer. I'm irked. FOX decides to wait that long to talk about Murcer, but what gets priority? Papelbon and the tabloids. Where's your soul, FOX?

    12:17
    They cancelled their soul 11 years ago, I'm told by Peter Paul Phillip Pascerelli.
    Martin is only the second man to gun down Kinsler this season. Realmofotalk was seen finding something negative to say.

    12:19
    Perhaps he was safe, Tejada misses the tag. Blame Canada.
    Fortunately we have instant replay to clear everything up.
    -crickets chirp-

    12:20
    Webb walks to the bull pen, apparently he has bribed Hurdle into considering pitching him. AL threatens again as they have men on 1st and 2nd. Michael Young is batting. Aaron Cook is still out there.

    12:22
    Holy shit, McLouth gunned down.. oh wait, it was the catcher. Terrific throw to take him out. Young nearly became the ASG hero again. Unbelievable.

    12:24
    Guzman is working it well at third. I, on the other hand, am starting on fumes as I enter the 12th on 130 pitches. Dusty Baker is leaving me in though.

    12:29
    McLouth beats one out, at 1st. Wisely, they don't pitch to Tejada. Shouldn't that be a question posed on "Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?" ..Do you pitch to Tejada with runners on?
    Hank Steinbrenner: umm umm ummmm MAYBE
    Jerry Narron: Can I bat him 8th?
    DMBZeppelin: I'd leave him in AAA.

    12:30
    Uggla, strikeout, inning ending double play and 2 errors. He's still alive on the outside, but he was dead 10 innings ago on the inside.

    12:33
    Uggla is on the verge of turning into Steven Seagal and snapping some necks. He struck out. He's reached the Rick Ankiel mountain of completely figuring out how to do everything wrong in a primetime spot.
    The AL is turning things over to some guy they found in the parking lot. Oh, it's George Sherrill. And I'm on page 8.

    12:34
    Please do something productive, Gonzalez. (worked last time)

    12:36
    Sherrill just bought a new hat as he came to the mound. He struck out Gonzo on 3 pitches. Agony.

    12:45
    To recap, AL threatened again. But Guzman showed off good range, again, and Kinsler grounded out to end the inning. I smell page 9.
    Is this going to end up being an epic disaster? Or an epic finish? Keep in mind what I said once before, the last game I tried doing one of these things for. I'm going with this no matter how long. I nearly have a full beard since I began this.

    12:51
    Guzman, normally a good bunter, screws up and bunts it right to Sherrill.
    By the way, AL is down to.. Kazmir. And that's grasping at straws (100 plus pitches thrown Sunday)

    12:55
    Buck and McCarver told Ludwick's story for the third time. And we go to the bottom of the inning. Someone.. please.. score.

    1:09
    More near misses, like, the AL again having runners on. Marmol pulled an anti-Trevor Hoffman and he got out.
    As for the NL, well, George Sherrill is still pitching to them. I think Baltimore called, told Francona you can pitch Sherrill however many innings you want. We agreed to deal Sherrill to the yankees after the game anyways. But don't tell Hank Steinbrenner

    1:10
    Long fly outs. That's all.
    Tim McCarver: This time it counts!
    Is it too late for Yogi to replace Tim? Al Leiter available?

    1:20
    The blimp for this game is still flying. Perhaps the most impressive feat.
    Coming in a close second, Ken Rosenthal and his attempts at humor.

    1:21
    Bud Selig is on hour 2 of suicide watch.

    1:22
    You know what's in Francona's mind? "I'm out of snuff and I really want to get piss drunk, PLEASE END NOW"
    Remind me, who did Texas deal Chris "6'10 and White" Young and Adrian Gonzalez for?

    1:24
    Wright and Kazmir were almost teammates. Almost!

    1:26
    Bottom of the inning we go.

    1:30
    Tidbits of info: Hollywood Land is coming on HBO. That would be the movie were Ben Affleck is playing George Reeve- the original TV superman.
    And then, the nuggets have traded Marcus Camby for... wait for it.. a 2nd rounder. Unfreakingbelievable.

    1:34
    The AL threatens again. Lidge is leaving things out to be hit, imagine that. And...

    1:40
    Michael Young is indeed the hero of the night, once again. Lidge blows it, sort of, not a big deal. His blown save against Albert Pujols, that was something. Young hits a walk off sac fly. Morneau just beats Corey Hart's um.. was that a throw, did he under hand it or girl toss it- I can't figure out which. He was either safe or out, thankfully we have instant replay to clear this up.
    Scott Kazmir, for duct taping his arm on enough to pitch, is my MVP (if you're scoring at home, J.D. Drew was the MVP)

    My final line, 15 innings, 10 hits, 12 strikeouts, 197 pitches. Thank you, Dusty.
    Last edited by missionhockey21; 09-07-2009 at 07:19 PM.
    Marshall: MILSWANCAs?
    Ted
    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
    Barney: Circle gets the square!

    The 2074 MSL NL Gold Glove Recipient at Third Base.

  2. #2
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 2

    And Aaron Cook?!?
    Marshall: MILSWANCAs?
    Ted
    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
    Barney: Circle gets the square!

    The 2074 MSL NL Gold Glove Recipient at Third Base.

  3. #3
    Hero ball. Kingdom's Avatar
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 2

    Cristian Guzman! George Sherrill!
    Marshall: MILSWANCAs?
    Ted
    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
    Barney: Circle gets the square!

    The 2074 MSL NL Gold Glove Recipient at Third Base.

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