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Thread: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

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    KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Welcome to 2008, the final All-Star game Yankee Stadium will see as it continues on with its fairwell tour. So, when it's gone after this season, will it wait till late February to consider a comeback? Do the yankees turn their back on that? Unfortunately, they still air the game on FOX, which only means Joe Buck and Tim McCarver, thorns to my sides or ears in this case. Admist all the whining about the all star game being terrible and the rosters being terrible and wah wah wah, my hat goes off to the increasing amount of young stars being in the game. As Peter Gammons pointed out, thanks to the internet, more people are moving on from the older guys. Longoria and Hart winning the final vote. Cliff Lee starting for the AL. Ryan Braun with an extraordinary amount of votes. Go baseball.


    8:42 PM
    Some Taco Bell commercial featuring the Arizona Diamondbacks with a voice over by Larry the Cable guy, or at least someone who sounds like him. What the hell?

    8:43 PM
    Ad for new show, FRINGE. It'll be gone by episode 4. Then they'll bring it back after a large online petition is signed. And then cancel it after episode 9

    8:45 PM
    National League lineup looks refreshingly exciting. Do you want to face Ryan Braun, as the #7 hitter? Didn't think so. Here's something that didn't get a lot of press: Kosuke is one of the most unimpressive top vote getters I know of, I mean, he has a good on base percentage and can rake at home, but he surely hasn't distinguished himself from others. His impact is been solid play and the popularity, which he only matches Ichiro and Matsui with the popularity. Sorry cubs fans, I am not impressed by his selection.

    8:48
    Cliff Lee on the mound, with a first pitch to Hanley Ramirez. Can we have a Cy Young from one of the worst teams in baseball? I'm waiting for the pity votes to win out for Mariano Rivera. He strikes out Ramirez.

    8:50
    You know what bothers me most about McCarver and Buck? When they talk history of baseball. It's like listening to Woody Paige and Jay Mariotti debate a fashion show. Lee just struck out Utley.

    8:51
    Lee proving he's no fluke, just breezed by the 1st inning. Remember when Montreal thought Bartolo Colon was worth Lee and Grady Sizemore? Remember when the indians didn't think Brandon Phillips would be a major league player? God, I love this game!

    8:52
    I loved the first two Mummy movies, and Brendan Fraser is a believable action star, but the Asian mummy movie feels so forced. I won't be seeing it until it reaches DVD.

    8:54
    Ben Sheets has managed to stay mostly healthy and as you might figure, he gets to start for the NL. It's really not surprising. The AL lineup reads like an NL lineup, good mix of power and speed and could easily score off the small ball strategy. I can't imagine Terry Francona knowing what small ball means. At this time, McCarver has started to bathe Derek Jeter with critical acclaim. And his tongue.

    8:56
    Another ASG hit for Jeter. Brings up Hamilton. And Jeter steals off Sheets. At some point, do we just reserve a spot on the team for Jeter, regardless of what kind of season he is having? Apparently they did this for Jason Varitek.

    8:59
    ARod is up. Breaking news: Madonna was not carrying his bat. Another reason Jeter ranks above ARod, he can bag Johannson and Beil in a matter of weeks, while ARod settles for their grandmother. Inning ends when McCarver's brain overloads on Jeter compliments.

    9:01
    To review the last dozen months: Robert Downey Jr. got clean, co-starred in a David Fincher film, crashed the world with Iron Man, and now he's playing an actor who's playing a black man. And Josh Hamilton has almost 100 RBI at the break. If I was running D.A.R.E. I'd be using those two subjects in my ad campaigns.

    9:07
    For the record, I'm taking Pujols in the Pujols/ARod debate. Kevin Costner is apparently channeling his inner Larry the Cable Guy for his new movie. What the hell?

    9:13
    Bradley draws the walk, shocker. I like the guy. I smirk at the fact that his detractors can only come up with "he talks too much". His teammates say he's a great teammate. Look, arguing with an umpire is not killing someone or for that matter, driving drunk or high which could kill someone. People overrated big mouths.

    9:14
    The actual Greek God of Walks is Nick Markakis. Google the numbers.

    9:15
    Another steal. But McCarver says it's the first of the night. Then corrects himself. My ears are bleeding.

    9:29
    I'm pretty sure Yogi was speaking during the inning. I need to check instant replay.

    9:29
    Oh, they don't have that in baseball yet. Joe Saunders looks good.

    9:30
    Rick Gonzalez doing a world series promo. Dane Cook and Jim Belushi were too busy.

    9:34
    Zambrano coasting, picking up where Sheets left off. I am disappointed though, Ichiro reaches base with Jeter coming up and nothing happens- except a double play. That combo should never hit into a double play.

    9:39
    Ichiro just showed why he's a shoe in for a Gold Glove and why Pujols does not run like the wind. By the way, Halladay is in. If he was on another team, he'd have 20 Cy Youngs. But he's not, he's still just an underrated star. He blinked and the inning was over.

    9:41
    Another hot chick is dancing with those Life Water lizards. PETA is typing up a spiteful email as we speak.

    9:43
    I was shocked by the Rich Harden deal. Billy Beane makes some weirdly questionable deals, and they mostly pan out for him. This time, he seemingly acquired only one guy that'll do something for Oakland and he decided to cover the Harden shipping costs by adding in Gaudin. On the otherside, the cubs front line reads: A guy who's been injured by his computer, a guy who's never thrown 200 innings, and their closer last season. Good times.

    9:45
    The Big Hambrano and Man-Ram have a John Kruk moment. I liked it better when a scary pitcher (Randy Johnson) was throwing to a not so scary hitter (Kruk).

    9:51
    Lots of ads for the pot/drugs film, Pineapple Express. Lots of publicity for Josh Hamilton. See where I'm going with this?
    Erv Santana has entered. He's proving his worth, impressive cadre of pitches. He's my pick for Cy Young if they decide to not consider anyone from bad teams.

    9:53
    We're still scoreless. Both teams blew it on the basepaths. More importantly, both teams are rearing back and out pitching the hitters. Sounds improbable. Really, when you think about it, the allstar game is the only allstar event where you can see good defense.

    9:56
    Seriously, I was typing all of that above when Holliday just broke the scoreless tie. I'm good for a jinx every now and then. He replaced Soriano. Clint Hurdle is proving to be very good at "strategery", makes you forget that Colorado is last in the West.

    9:57
    Terrible plug for the man who wouldn't participate in the homerun derby. Which baffles me, it's the last year for the damn stadium, could they have not bent the rules and had someone from the Yankees participate? Giambi? Shelley Duncan? Drew Henson?
    McCarver: "ARod was off the field before the fans could even react to it". ARod, now being replaced with Joe Crede. Way to go out in a blaze of glory. Santana rebounds to finish off the inning.

    10:00
    I've lasted this long. I promised I would do one of these for the site, but it's not as easy as you think. Takes notes, or type on a computer why the game is going on. But you get lost in a game, especially if it's a good game and forget to actually type anything. I even tried doing a diary between two teams I didn't care about (that game ended up lasting 22 innings or something).

    [BREAK=Page 2 of Part 1]

    10:02
    I have successfully called Haren becoming a great pitcher and Blanton becoming.. nothing, on this very site. -glee-
    Haren is in. Webb still hasn't pitched, the reigning Cy Young who's once again up for that award. What an impressive cast of NL pitchers.

    10:03
    Kinsler is in! Pinch running after Haren made a gaff trying to make a web gem on Joe Mauer. Speaking of Mauer, the NL has 3 great, young catchers and the AL has.. Joe Mauer. He pretty much saved the AL's integrity at that position.

    10:05
    Steal #3. Kinsler has only been caught once this year. Haren just walked a guy. Did I jinx him too?

    10:10
    The AL had 2 men on, with Ichiro and Jeter coming up. The results? Nothing. In some weird world that I'm currently living in, two top notch clutch bats just failed to do anything with two good baserunners.

    10:13
    FRINGE's only hope is that the constant advertising pays off, like it did for HOUSE. Of course, House is a good show, so.

    10:15
    The black sheep of the all star game replaced Joe Mauer behind the plate. The Duch-Snort is in, his ERA is better than.. everyone's, actually.

    10:16
    If you are keeping score at home, Dan Uggla and Joakim Soria were rule 5 guys. And they're all stars.

    10:19
    Another under appreciated star, Berkman, drove in Hanley Ramirez. It's 2-0, if you haven't fallen asleep yet.
    Jeter gets the same plug as ARod, except the fans got to cheer him before he vanished. ARod, perhaps, has the worst timing ever for a major pop culture figure.

    10:21
    The NL is going small, singles and doubles. Kevin "Mister" Kennedy interviews Jeter. Here's my thing, Jeter and Tiger Woods, great iconic athletes, but probably the safest interviews you can possibly imagine. Do they ever mess up?

    10:22
    Jeter just dropkicked manager Joe Girardi and put Hamilton in a sharp shooter. The fans gave a standing ovation. ESPN applauded his work. Pedro Gomez knelt to praise him.

    10:30
    I love how well the Volquez-Hamilton deal turned out. It's too bad there's not of those major league for major leaguer trades. Speaking of which, if the reds knew what would happen and the rangers didn't, think the reds fans could live with parting ways with Adam Dunn? It's a scenario that plays out like the fans turning heel and hitting Dunn in the back with a bat. JP Riccardi would approve.

    10:34
    Another steal, if you're counting, rangers have 3 steals. The problem with the AL is that they have a team built for the little things like this but either the clutch guys are getting baffled or the Joe Credes are trying to hit a 700 foot homerun. Work in increments, guys!

    10:35
    Jeter with a neckbreaker on George Steinbrenner. Brian Cashman has fled Yankee stadium faster than Hideki Irabu chasing a buffet bar.

    10:36
    So for Aquos images/tvs commercial, they hired Rutger Hauer circa Blade Runner era. Or the psychopath from Me, Myself and Irene. Haven't figured out which is creepier to have for a commercial.

    10:41
    Breaking news: Josh Groban is not singing you raise me up.
    Also if you're keeping score at home, the dbacks have effectively given up on Dan Uggla and Carlos Quentin. Both are all stars.

    10:47
    The best pitcher in the first half has entered for the National League. And Volquez immediately gives up a double to Morneau. Just how Disney scripted it.

    10:50
    Dioner Navarro is up for the AL. Realmofotalk is currently crying at his Andruw Jones fathead.
    Just learned that Francona only has Carlos Guillen on the bench. Oh, I forgot, someone had to be the token Detroit representative. Volquez just busted out Charlie Sheen's Rick Vaughn "terminator" pitch to wax Navarro. Unreal.

    10:52
    Joe Girardi is catching KRod, as he's warming up. Still looks natural. Jose Molina broke into a cold sweat.

    10:53
    Game tied. By who? J.D. Drew. That 70 billion dollar grand slam last season has carried over this long. 2 run shot to right. A red sock tied it in Yankee Stadium, just as it was scripted by Disney.

    10:55
    That homerun was Dusty Baker's fault.

    10:59
    Typical. FOX quick with over reporting. My response: yawn.
    What am I talking about? Papelbon said blah blah blah about blah blah blah so the fans go wah wah wah. I don't know. McCarver is upset though, we've reached the red level on the McCarverometer.

    11:00
    If you saw Dan Uggla walking in a store, but had no idea he was a pro baseball player, what do you think you might think he'd be? White Goodman moment, I know.
    Another note I wanted to make, Nate McLouth. Used to think he was a black guy. He's a blond surfer guy. -Whiff-
    And McCarver just said something about someone being pregnant. -crickets chirping-

    The dramatic season finale of Lost can be read here! Errr, part 2 can be found here.
    Last edited by missionhockey21; 09-07-2009 at 07:19 PM.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Dioner Navarro is up for the AL. Realmofotalk is currently crying at his Andruw Jones fathead.
    The Yankees, too, gave up on Navarro, and he was like their best prospect. And if Navarro were still a Dodger, Russell Martin would probably be a Devil Ray, anyway.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    or at 3B
    Marshall: MILSWANCAs?
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    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Yeah, right, and Drew Brees would have switched to wide receiver for the Chargers.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Martin was an infielder before he was a catcher.
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    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Well, duh, I knew that. That was his ticket to the big leagues. Navarro was in his way? Get rid of Navarro.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    You can paint it however you want, but I was knocking the signing of Jones and not the trading away of Navarro.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Believe it or not, at least a couple people here (including McKain) liked the signing of Jones to replace Pierre at center. Screw you, you know you wanted Fatdruw back in Atlanta.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Sure, if it only cost Atlanta a few cans of slimfast.

    I was more disappointed that their answer to his loss was some Josh Anderson guy I've never heard of and dealing Devine for Kotsay and his missing back.
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    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Let the records show that I hated the deal from the beginning.
    Quote Originally Posted by realmofotalk View Post
    Yet another waste of fans' money going toward a player on the downside.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    He needs to take a year off, like Sosa did. Get in shape, drink less alcohol, etc.. He's not as bad of a hitter as he is this season/was most of last season. But that'll mean nothing to the dodgers, lol. Onward march, MATT KEMP!
    Marshall: MILSWANCAs?
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    : Wait, I can get this. Mothers I'd like to sleep with and never call again.
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Martin is a top 3 catcher right now in the majors, you get rid of Navarro
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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Where is the part when Hurdle put in Wagner instead of sticking with Wilson?? That right there changed the game and eventually cost the NL the game! **** putting everyone in. If a guy is on, leave him be!!

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    Quote Originally Posted by Halladay_is_God View Post
    Martin is a top 3 catcher right now in the majors, you get rid of Navarro
    LOL. Martin displaced Navarro in LA, and eight years later he does it again in Toronto.

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    Re: KoZ's 2008 All Star Game Running Diary, part 1

    mofo topping posts from 6 years ago leads to some gems...

    "Ichiro reaches base with Jeter coming up and nothing happens- except a double play. That combo should never hit into a double play."

    except in yankee stadium the last 2 years!

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